A Love Story: The Warm Welcome Space at St. Andrew’s Church, Alford

In memory and in honour of Ruth, Joan and Lorna

The Friendship Café can be found in the small rural village of Alford, Aberdeenshire. It’s brimming with warmth, laughter, and friendship. Over the last four years, it’s created a mutually caring atmosphere that has developed from a formerly disparate group of people, many of whom live alone. When it first opened its doors, it was very much about providing a warm space, a bowl of soup, and space to chat. The group of volunteers say they did not envisage the depth of connection that has developed or the number of people it would attract. It’s grown into a family of supportive friends who care about and look after each other. It’s a love story.

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Friendship and Mutual Support

The Friendship Café has grown rapidly over the years; initially welcoming around 10 to 12 people, it now extends the welcome to around 50 weekly guests! There are so many regulars for whom it’s a big part of their lives, especially for those living on their own and in a village where other cafes have restricted openings or have closed altogether.

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As the number of guests has grown, so has the number of volunteers needed to keep things going. On Cafe days, there can be as many as 60 people, both guests and volunteers, who have morphed into a group of old friends who enjoy each other’s company and the sense of belonging it brings and the opportunity for mutual support.

Honouring Ruth, Joan and Lorna

This story is shared in honour of three stalwart ladies, Ruth, Joan and Lorna, who all died within six weeks of each other. They were at the heart of the Friendship Café, attending from the very beginning; they had all in their different ways made their mark by sharing their laughter, sorrows, and lives, and their friendship will be missed by everyone. The Friendship Café was one of the few places where they felt comfortable. Their loss has been felt deeply by all at the Friendship Café.

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One of the Friendship Café’s volunteers said,

"It's a sad loss for us all. Over the last four years these people had become our friends. But how gratifying to know the depth of the impact of Warm Welcome. It only goes to show, that when stepping forward as a volunteer, that as well as experiencing all the plusses and positives, you are also exposing yourself to the inevitable sadness of the wider family you have created. And, of course, the guests too are only too aware of the three empty places.”

So deep is the connection that both volunteers and Café regulars attended all three funeral services, and in two of them, the departed’s love of the Café was referred to in the obituary.

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“It only goes to show that we never quite realise the difference we are making to people's lives.”

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Why everyone loves the Friendship Café

Guests and volunteers alike are drawn to the Friendship Café for the warmth of welcome, companionship, and the smell of delicious soup and special celebration meals. Volunteers and partners go the extra mile, offering transport to those who need it. No one is ever left out. They even offer Café takeaways to those who cannot attend. More than anything it creates a sense of belonging, where everyone knows your name, and birthdays are always celebrated. Being Aberdeenshire, much of the conversation is in the native dialect of Doric, and, although there is no direct translation of ‘Warm Welcome’, guests are bidden to the table in traditional north-eastern way by ‘Come awa’ in, si’ doon, an’ tak’ aff yer jaiket.’

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Volunteers of every kind are essential to keeping the Friendship Café’s doors open. From those who give a huge time commitment, to those involved only from time to time, and those who leave no stone unturned to make a positive contribution.

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Friendship Cafe volunteers go over and above outside the Café’s opening hours; they give lifts to the local Co-op, meet guests for coffee, recognise and chat when meeting around the village, are invited to guests’ own homes, and share their stories, both happy and sad, showing love and compassion. And guests who did not previously know each other are known to meet up on non-cafe days.

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The ambience of the Church is an asset. As a project initiated by St. Andrew’s Church, there is a strong but subtle influence of Christian love and outreach, even though many do not subscribe to any faith. Everyone is welcome.

Love and Compassion

There’s a special kind of magic found at the Friendship Café, the magic of love and compassion. It’s one of the 6,300-plus Warm Welcome Spaces that form a Chain of Hope stretching out right across the UK. Each link in the chain offers a bond of hope and compassion, there for every member of the community to enjoy.

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